She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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