Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
