i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
