If that was your dad, he is hot
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Someone signed my nipple.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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