I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
