Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
