Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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