i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize