i need an iv and a liver transplant
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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