I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Randomize