All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
