i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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