So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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