Well apparently he's into motor boating.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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