I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
