This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
