i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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