did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize