i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
you had me at cake vodka
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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