and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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