I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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