So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
