There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Randomize