Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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