Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
