that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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