Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
