We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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