The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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