My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize