redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
