Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
