Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
