dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize