their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
