god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
My vagina just clenched in fear
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
