Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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