Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
