and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
