All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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