Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
