? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
