he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
You left your phone here
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