Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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