I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
