Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
