Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
