I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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