But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize