just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
