he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
